Many parenting websites seem to focus mostly on the level of just helping parents get through the day. \u00a0I get it. \u00a0When it comes to raising children, just getting through the day can be hard enough! \u00a0I\u2019m thinking about the morning push to get out of the house\u2026 \u00a0Dressing, toothbrushing, packing snacks, finding the wayward shoe under the couch, making it to the potty, forgetting someone\u2019s stuffed animal, going back for it… \u00a0Sometimes when we finally make it out to the car, I cheer out loud. \u00a0We did it! \u00a0Bonus points if everyone has a clean shirt on, myself included.<\/p>\n
But in my reflective moments, lying in bed at night nursing my little one, or watching my children play, I hear my deeper needs. \u00a0I feel how important it is to me to create a family culture that does more than just get us through the day. \u00a0One that meets our soul needs, as well as our physical ones. \u00a0\u00a0I want our family culture to help bring out the best in us– to support us in developing courage, resilience, creativity, and love.<\/p>\n
My mama friends and I talk a lot about this. \u00a0I think what we\u2019re really talking about is nurturing the spiritual life of children. \u00a0By spiritual, I don\u2019t necessarily mean belief in God, though for some of us, belief may be part of it. \u00a0\u00a0I\u2019m really using the term \u201cspiritual\u201d more broadly, to encompass questions like:<\/p>\n
- \n
- What is the nature of our belonging– to each other, and to the more than human world?<\/strong><\/li>\n
- To what \/ whom are we responsible?<\/strong><\/li>\n
- Where do we get our strength?<\/strong> \u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
As someone who loves learning about the world\u2019s spiritual traditions, I’ve thought\u00a0a lot\u00a0about these questions. \u00a0But now that I\u2019m a parent, they feel more pressing than ever.<\/p>\n
Wendy Rose, a Hopi-Miwok poet says that amongst her people, there\u2019s a saying that\u2019s the worst insult you can say to a person. \u00a0\u201cYou act like you have no relatives.\u201d<\/strong> \u00a0Our right relationship to the earth, Hopi belief holds, is one that sees human beings living in balance with other creatures, all sacred parts of a larger sacred whole. \u00a0When you think about this, and really live into it, you can imagine how it might feel to act from this place– with a sense of your own sacredness, and also the sacredness that surrounds you. \u00a0Here, humans are not greater than, or even separate from, the natural world. \u00a0Nature is not outside us. \u00a0It’s in us. \u00a0We are of it. \u00a0There is no outside.<\/span><\/p>\n
You can imagine how this view would promote a very deep sense of stewardship. \u00a0With belonging comes responsibility. <\/span><\/p>\n
Today, I want to offer four\u00a0ways to nurture your child\u2019s sense of belonging in nature, in a way that will help them get in touch with\u00a0nature\u2019s sacredness, and their own. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/20160210_120249.jpg\")
<\/p>\n1. \u00a0Nurture A Sense of Place<\/b><\/h1>\n
Choose a natural place to visit with your child.<\/strong> \u00a0Look for somewhere you can get your hands dirty– where your child can climb, dig, get wet, move things around. \u00a0If you choose a garden, make sure it\u2019s a place that\u2019s child friendly. \u00a0Botanical Gardens, while beautiful, often have rules that prohibit the kind of play children most need. \u00a0Look for a place where you and your child can sit under a tree, climb on the rocks, and gather natural treasures.<\/span><\/p>\n
Visit this same place regularly.<\/strong> \u00a0Go once a week. \u00a0If you’re home with your young child, you might even go twice a week. \u00a0Three times, even. \u00a0You want to get to know this place over time, to see it in all its seasons and moods. <\/span><\/p>\n
As you spend time there, you may start to notice ways to tend the place. \u00a0You start to bring along a\u00a0plastic bag along to pick up trash. \u00a0You notice a small plant whose leaves are in shadow, and you start clearing the plants around it to give it room to breathe.<\/span><\/p>\n
The place starts to take care of you too. \u00a0You see blackberries growing, and you taste a few. \u00a0The next week it\u2019s nasturtiums, your child pretending to be a hummingbird as he sips from a blossom. \u00a0Soon, you find yourself waiting, anticipating with delight what new things you\u2019ll find in the woods on this visit.<\/span><\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/20161113_130942.jpg\")
<\/h1>\n2. \u00a0Let Your Child Play<\/b><\/h1>\n
Establishing a relationship with a place is a multi-sensory process. \u00a0Nowhere is this more evident than with little ones. \u00a0Put your little one down and watch her explore.<\/strong> \u00a0Your baby will hold things, stack things, smell things, put things in her mouth, clamber and climb. \u00a0\u00a0At around two and a half, you may start seeing\u00a0the beginnings of imaginative play. \u00a0You don\u2019t need to bring toys. \u00a0Anything can be anything<\/strong>, and never more so than in nature.<\/span><\/p>\n
My three-year-old son liked to set up a sewing shop, and delighted in \u201csewing\u201d scarves and other garments out of fallen leaves, using a twig for a needle. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n
Imaginative play is the absolute best use of your child’s time in early childhood.<\/strong> \u00a0 Free play\u00a0develops imagination, creativity, resilience, social skills, collaboration, self-sufficiency, and so many other valuable qualities that contribute to a healthy sense of self in relation to others.<\/span><\/p>\n
To help children play, give them some space to be autonomous<\/strong>. \u00a0Hold a space of loving presence for them, but try not to get overly involved, praise them, or otherwise direct their experience. \u00a0It can be helpful to sit nearby with a project of your own. \u00a0Choose something low-tech like knitting, sewing, or food prep. \u00a0Something that allows you to remain present with your child. \u00a0Something you could do while chatting quietly with a friend. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n
Your warm, not overly-engaged attention helps create the space for your child to make his own discoveries, and learn from his own mistakes.<\/strong> \u00a0Be loving and available. \u00a0Offer a lap when needed. \u00a0But also give him enough space\u00a0that he\u00a0can\u00a0feel supported by all that exists beyond you and your love– the environment around him, the ground beneath him, and his own developing inner sense.<\/span><\/p>\n
<\/h1>\n
![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/gtree_march19-2016-02.jpeg\")
<\/b><\/h1>\n3. \u00a0Story the Earth<\/b><\/h1>\n
When you spend a lot of time in a natural place, its trees, stones and paths soon become familiar. \u00a0One way to strengthen your relationship to these things is to name them. \u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n
When I first worked in a Waldorf kindergarten, there was a stately old oak tree in the park where we spent recess. \u00a0We called it the Grandmother Tree. Like a grandmother, the tree watched over the children. \u00a0When a little one wanted to climb up, her lap was always ready, and she was seldom without a small child cradled in her branches.<\/span><\/p>\n
In Waldorf early childhood education, teachers name a lot of things. \u00a0Lady Fall. \u00a0King Winter. \u00a0Father Sun. \u00a0It can sound funny if you\u2019re not used to it, but these names aren’t intended to be cute or quaint.<\/strong> \u00a0Rather, they acknowledge an important dimension of life, one that we as adults may have lost touch with. \u00a0When we call on the power of naming, we come to know our world in a new way. \u00a0We start to feel the meaning in things beyond outside\u00a0appearances. \u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n
Children are already there– watch how your child\u2019s eyes light up when you tell her a story about the Grandmother Tree she knows and loves. \u00a0“One day a child climbed too high, and couldn’t get down. \u00a0But Grandmother tree knew what to do. \u00a0She called the animals, who helped the girl get down.\u00a0 With bear and rabbit, she sat at the base of Grandmother tree and had their picnic. \u00a0And what a fine meal it was.” \u00a0A simple story like this nurtures your child\u2019s relationship to the earth in a way no other medium can do, because it meets children where they\u2019re at– in a place of imagination. \u00a0Through engaging our children’s imagination, we cultivate wonder, and\u00a0wonder is the spiritual currency of childhood.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n
When we do this, we also nurture\u00a0the sensibility in our children that leads to stewardship. \u00a0We can nurture stewardship by\u00a0establishing<\/span>\u00a0relationships that help us see things as more than just mere things- to see them as beings with their own sovereignty, their own power to bless. \u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n
To me, this is also the deep work of parenting. \u00a0To see my children past the veil of my projections. \u00a0To see them as they are– my children, and not my children. \u00a0Children of the universe. \u00a0Runny nosed, maybe with ketchup on their ear from breakfast. \u00a0Crying, laughing, playing.<\/span><\/p>\n
Perfect as they are.<\/span><\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/06\/20161114_RITGER_Noe-Venable_284-1.jpg\")
<\/h1>\n4. \u00a0Sing\u00a0<\/b><\/h1>\n
And last but not least, sing.<\/strong><\/p>\n
You can sing songs you know, or just make them up. \u00a0Try connecting songs with places. \u00a0Choose a stump-jumping song. \u00a0Hum a tune when you cross the river.<\/span><\/p>\n
My children and I eventually had a song for every path in the garden, and to this day, I cannot walk through the garden without humming\u00a0the songs. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n
A song is like a ritual in a bottle. \u00a0You have only to open your mouth to channel something precious. \u00a0Something wise. \u00a0Something that will bring you together in a space of meaning. \u00a0To sing together can bring joy.\u00a0 You might even find it gives you\u00a0that little extra boost of strength you need to get through the day.<\/span><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_cta admin_label=”Call To Action” url_new_window=”off” use_background_color=”on” background_color=”#9cd8a9″ background_layout=”dark” text_orientation=”left” use_border_color=”off” border_color=”#ffffff” border_style=”solid” custom_button=”off” button_letter_spacing=”0″ button_use_icon=”default” button_icon_placement=”right” button_on_hover=”on” button_letter_spacing_hover=”0″ saved_tabs=”all” body_font_size=”18″]<\/p>\n
If you enjoyed this post, here are a few ways to go deeper:<\/span><\/p>\n
Wherever you live, you can\u00a0download our latest\u00a0musical release<\/span><\/a> for families<\/strong>. \u00a0It’s free \/ pay what you want.<\/h3>\n
If you’re in the SF Bay Area,<\/strong> join us in person for:<\/p>\n
Meadowlark Music Class<\/a>\u00a0<\/span><\/strong>for children and caregivers<\/strong><\/h3>\n
Apple Star,<\/span><\/strong>\u00a0<\/b>our Waldorf Parent Child Class<\/b><\/h3>\n
Mothersong Chorus<\/a><\/span>, <\/strong>an\u00a0intergenerational singing circle <\/strong>for women and girls.<\/h3>\n
[\/et_pb_cta][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
[et_pb_section bb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section”][et_pb_row admin_label=”row”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″][et_pb_text admin_label=”Text” background_layout=”light” text_orientation=”left” use_border_color=”off” border_color=”#ffffff” border_style=”solid” text_font_size=”16″ custom_padding=”|15%||15%”] There are a lot of resources out there to help us become better parents. \u00a0Blogs, books, podcasts\u2026 In my own parenting journey, they\u2019ve been valuable. \u00a0They\u2019ve helped me learn to foster positive sibling relationships. \u00a0To hold space for my toddlers\u2019 strong emotions. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1410,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"
There are a lot of resources out there to help us become better parents. \u00a0Blogs, books, podcasts\u2026 In my own parenting journey, they\u2019ve been valuable. \u00a0They\u2019ve helped me learn to foster positive sibling relationships. \u00a0To hold space for my toddlers\u2019 strong emotions. \u00a0They\u2019ve reminded me to practice self-care. \u00a0When things are challenging with my children, they\u2019ve helped me feel less alone.<\/span><\/p>
Many parenting websites seem to focus mostly on the level of just helping parents get through the day. \u00a0I get it. \u00a0When it comes to raising children, just getting through the day can be hard enough! \u00a0I\u2019m thinking about the morning push to get out of the house\u2026 \u00a0Dressing, toothbrushing, packing snacks, finding the wayward shoe under the couch, making it to the potty, forgetting someone\u2019s stuffed animal, going back for it... \u00a0Sometimes when we finally make it out to the car, I cheer out loud. \u00a0We did it! \u00a0Bonus points if everyone has a clean shirt on, myself included.<\/p>
But in my reflective moments, lying in bed at night nursing my little one, or watching my children play, I hear my deeper needs. \u00a0I feel how important it is to me to create a family culture that does more than just get us through the day. \u00a0One that meets our soul needs, as well as our physical ones. \u00a0\u00a0I want our family culture to help bring out the best in us-- to support us in developing courage, resilience, creativity, and love.<\/p>
My mama friends and I talk a lot about this. \u00a0I think what we\u2019re really talking about is nurturing the spiritual life of children. \u00a0By spiritual, I don\u2019t necessarily mean belief in God, though for some of us, belief may be part of it. \u00a0\u00a0I\u2019m really using the term \u201cspiritual\u201d more broadly, to encompass questions like:<\/p>
- What is the nature of our belonging-- to each other, and to the more than human world?<\/strong><\/li>
- To what \/ whom are we responsible?<\/strong><\/li>
- Where do we get our strength?<\/strong> \u00a0<\/span><\/li><\/ul>
As someone who loves learning about the world\u2019s spiritual traditions, I've thought\u00a0a lot\u00a0about these questions. \u00a0But now that I\u2019m a parent, they feel more pressing than ever.<\/p>
Wendy Rose, a Hopi-Miwok poet says that amongst her people, there\u2019s a saying that\u2019s the worst insult you can say to a person. \u00a0\u201cYou act like you have no relatives.\u201d<\/strong> \u00a0Our right relationship to the earth, Hopi belief holds, is one that sees human beings living in balance with other creatures, all sacred parts of a larger sacred whole. \u00a0When you think about this, and really live into it, you can imagine how it might feel to act from this place-- with a sense of your own sacredness, and also the sacredness that surrounds you. \u00a0Here, humans are not greater than, or even separate from, the natural world. \u00a0Nature is not outside us. \u00a0It's in us. \u00a0We are of it. \u00a0There is no outside.<\/span><\/p>
You can imagine how this view would promote a very deep sense of stewardship. \u00a0With belonging comes responsibility. <\/span><\/p>
Today, I want to offer four\u00a0ways to nurture your child\u2019s sense of belonging in nature, in a way that will help them get in touch with\u00a0nature\u2019s sacredness, and their own. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>
1. \u00a0Nurture A Sense of Place<\/b><\/h1>
Choose a natural place to visit with your child.<\/strong> \u00a0Look for somewhere you can get your hands dirty-- where your child can climb, dig, get wet, move things around. \u00a0If you choose a garden, make sure it\u2019s a place that\u2019s child friendly. \u00a0Botanical Gardens, while beautiful, often have rules that prohibit the kind of play children most need. \u00a0Look for a place where you and your child can sit under a tree, climb on the rocks, and gather natural treasures.<\/span><\/p>
Visit this same place regularly.<\/strong> \u00a0Go once a week. \u00a0If you're home with your young child, you might even go twice a week. \u00a0Three times, even. \u00a0You want to get to know this place over time, to see it in all its seasons and moods. <\/span><\/p>
As you spend time there, you may start to notice ways to tend the place. \u00a0You start to bring along a\u00a0plastic bag along to pick up trash. \u00a0You notice a small plant whose leaves are in shadow, and you start clearing the plants around it to give it room to breathe.<\/span><\/p>
The place starts to take care of you too. \u00a0You see blackberries growing, and you taste a few. \u00a0The next week it\u2019s nasturtiums, your child pretending to be a hummingbird as he sips from a blossom. \u00a0Soon, you find yourself waiting, anticipating with delight what new things you\u2019ll find in the woods on this visit.<\/span><\/p>
2. \u00a0Let Your Child Play<\/b><\/h1>
Establishing a relationship with a place is a multi-sensory process. \u00a0Nowhere is this more evident than with little ones. \u00a0Put your little one down and watch her explore.<\/strong> \u00a0Your baby will hold things, stack things, smell things, put things in her mouth, clamber and climb. \u00a0\u00a0At around two and a half, you may start seeing\u00a0the beginnings of imaginative play. \u00a0You don\u2019t need to bring toys. \u00a0Anything can be anything<\/strong>, and never more so than in nature.<\/span><\/p>
My three-year-old son liked to set up a sewing shop, and delighted in \u201csewing\u201d scarves and other garments out of fallen leaves, using a twig for a needle. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>
Imaginative play is the absolute best use of your child's time in early childhood.<\/strong> \u00a0 Free play\u00a0develops imagination, creativity, resilience, social skills, collaboration, self-sufficiency, and so many other valuable qualities that contribute to a healthy sense of self in relation to others.<\/span><\/p>
To help children play, give them some space to be autonomous<\/strong>. \u00a0Hold a space of loving presence for them, but try not to get overly involved, praise them, or otherwise direct their experience. \u00a0It can be helpful to sit nearby with a project of your own. \u00a0Choose something low-tech like knitting, sewing, or food prep. \u00a0Something that allows you to remain present with your child. \u00a0Something you could do while chatting quietly with a friend. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>
Your warm, not overly-engaged attention helps create the space for your child to make his own discoveries, and learn from his own mistakes.<\/strong> \u00a0Be loving and available. \u00a0Offer a lap when needed. \u00a0But also give him enough space\u00a0that he\u00a0can\u00a0feel supported by all that exists beyond you and your love-- the environment around him, the ground beneath him, and his own developing inner sense.<\/span><\/p>
3. \u00a0Story the Earth<\/b><\/h1>
When you spend a lot of time in a natural place, its trees, stones and paths soon become familiar. \u00a0One way to strengthen your relationship to these things is to name them. \u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>
When I first worked in a Waldorf kindergarten, there was a stately old oak tree in the park where we spent recess. \u00a0We called it the Grandmother Tree. Like a grandmother, the tree watched over the children. \u00a0When a little one wanted to climb up, her lap was always ready, and she was seldom without a small child cradled in her branches.<\/span><\/p>
In Waldorf early childhood education, teachers name a lot of things. \u00a0Lady Fall. \u00a0King Winter. \u00a0Father Sun. \u00a0It can sound funny if you\u2019re not used to it, but these names aren't intended to be cute or quaint.<\/strong> \u00a0Rather, they acknowledge an important dimension of life, one that we as adults may have lost touch with. \u00a0When we call on the power of naming, we come to know our world in a new way. \u00a0We start to feel the meaning in things beyond outside\u00a0appearances. \u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>
Children are already there-- watch how your child\u2019s eyes light up when you tell her a story about the Grandmother Tree she knows and loves. \u00a0\"One day a child climbed too high, and couldn't get down. \u00a0But Grandmother tree knew what to do. \u00a0She called the animals, who helped the girl get down.\u00a0 With bear and rabbit, she sat at the base of Grandmother tree and had their picnic. \u00a0And what a fine meal it was.\" \u00a0A simple story like this nurtures your child\u2019s relationship to the earth in a way no other medium can do, because it meets children where they\u2019re at-- in a place of imagination. \u00a0Through engaging our children's imagination, we cultivate wonder, and\u00a0wonder is the spiritual currency of childhood.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>
When we do this, we also nurture\u00a0the sensibility in our children that leads to stewardship. \u00a0We can nurture stewardship by\u00a0establishing<\/span>\u00a0relationships that help us see things as more than just mere things- to see them as beings with their own sovereignty, their own power to bless. \u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>
To me, this is also the deep work of parenting. \u00a0To see my children past the veil of my projections. \u00a0To see them as they are-- my children, and not my children. \u00a0Children of the universe. \u00a0Runny nosed, maybe with ketchup on their ear from breakfast. \u00a0Crying, laughing, playing. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>
Perfect as they are.<\/span><\/p>
4. \u00a0Sing<\/b><\/h1>
And last but not least, sing.<\/strong><\/p>
You can sing songs you know, or just make them up. \u00a0Try connecting songs with places. \u00a0Choose a stump-jumping song. \u00a0Hum a tune when you cross the river.<\/span><\/p>
My children and I eventually had a song for every path in the garden, and to this day, I cannot walk through the garden without hearing the songs. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>
A song is like a ritual in a bottle. \u00a0You have only to open your mouth to channel something precious. \u00a0Something wise. \u00a0Something that will bring you together in a space of warmth and meaning-- an open air ritual, where everyone comes as they are.<\/span><\/p>
\u00a0<\/p>","_et_gb_content_width":"","_s2mail":"yes"},"categories":[3,7,4,1,5],"tags":[52,48,49,41,51,50,25,45,47,46,44],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1398"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1398"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1398\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1410"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1398"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1398"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/singingcircles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1398"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
- To what \/ whom are we responsible?<\/strong><\/li>
- To what \/ whom are we responsible?<\/strong><\/li>\n