{"id":668,"date":"2022-09-08T11:45:00","date_gmt":"2022-09-08T11:45:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/?p=668"},"modified":"2023-01-23T17:09:43","modified_gmt":"2023-01-23T17:09:43","slug":"the-obstacle-to-wholehearted-living-that-no-one-is-talking-about","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/the-obstacle-to-wholehearted-living-that-no-one-is-talking-about\/","title":{"rendered":"Understanding the Masks we Wear"},"content":{"rendered":"\n[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.17.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.17.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.17.3″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.17.3″ _module_preset=”default” inline_fonts=”Lora” global_colors_info=”{}”]

If you want to live a wholehearted life, there’s one question it can be helpful to think about.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

The question is this:<\/span><\/p>\n

What masks do you wear?<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

What do I mean by mask?<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

Your mask is whatever false self you might sometimes put on to help you feel safer in the world.<\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s like a wall that we built up around ourselves.<\/span><\/p>\n

Jung called it the Persona.\u00a0 <\/span>In Depth Hypnosis, we call it the mask.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

The mask tends to develop in adolescence.<\/span><\/p>\n

You might think of it as an inflated, pumped up version of yourself that you hide behind when engaging with the world.<\/span><\/p>\n

Why?<\/span><\/p>\n

We develop the mask to protect ourselves.\u00a0 <\/span>It’s like a defensive shield we erect to conceal our core vulnerabilities, to prevent us from being hurt again, the way we were when we were young.<\/span><\/p>\n

The cause of these vulnerabilities is the wounds we experienced in childhood.<\/span><\/p>\n

Maybe you experienced some form of abuse, and you have trauma as a result.<\/span><\/p>\n

Maybe your parent was narcissistic, and just never seemed to see you.<\/span><\/p>\n

Or maybe the wounding was subtler – parents who met your physical needs, but neglected your emotional ones.<\/span><\/p>\n

In any case, the result was the likely the same – around adolescence, you built up an inflated, idealized self to hide behind, to avoid being hurt again.<\/span><\/p>\n

The mask self can take many forms.<\/span><\/p>\n

Were you the PLEASER<\/strong>?<\/span><\/p>\n

The ACHIEVER<\/strong>?<\/span><\/p>\n

The ONE WHO WOULD NEVER LOSE YOUR COOL?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Whatever mask you may have developed for self protection, you can be sure of this:<\/span><\/p>\n

The only way to stand fully in your power is to meet and embrace that core vulnerability that lies beyond the mask.<\/span><\/p>\n

To be truly empowered requires\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

1)\u00a0 <\/span>Rediscovering the parts of you that are raw and vulnerable<\/strong>.\u00a0 <\/span>That person who was hurt all that time ago, what was s\/he needing?\u00a0 <\/span>What message does s\/he have for you now?<\/span><\/p>\n

2)\u00a0 <\/span>Healing the places where you got hurt.<\/strong>\u00a0 <\/span>Holding those wounded, vulnerable parts of you in the light of loving awareness, and re-engaging with them as the adult you are now, with the power to meet those unmet needs and create new patterns of thinking, being, and relating.<\/span><\/p>\n

3)\u00a0 <\/span>Re-integrating those healing, vulnerable parts of you<\/strong> so that you can stand strong in a wholeness infused with ALL that you are.<\/span><\/p>\n

So, this question – What masks do you wear?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

When it comes to inner growth, it can be a starting point, and a key.<\/span><\/p>\n

Write about it.\u00a0 Talk it through.\u00a0 Take it into your meditation.\u00a0 Take this question out for a walk.\u00a0 Up a mountain.\u00a0 Down the street.\u00a0 Live this question, and see what it brings you, up from the deep.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And then, if you’d like to go deeper, and to read something that might help you identify which type of mask self may be most active for you, I recommend the book The Undefended Self<\/span><\/strong><\/span> by Susan Thesenga.\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s a dense read, but it’s packed with valuable insights for inner development.<\/span><\/p>\n

Wishing you the best in your healing journey, and if you\u2019re looking for one on one support<\/strong>, please don\u2019t hesitate to <\/span> reach out<\/a>.<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

This kind of deep work is what my one on one practice is for, and I’d love to support you.<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

With care,<\/span><\/p>\n

Noe<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

P.S.\u00a0 The ideas expressed in this blog draw upon the body of work known as Depth Hypnosis, as developed by Dr. Isa Guicciardi, PhD.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

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If you want to live a wholehearted life, there’s one question it can be helpful to think about.\u00a0 The question is this: What masks do you wear? What do I mean by mask? Your mask is whatever false self you might sometimes put on to help you feel safer in the world. It\u2019s like a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":672,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[18,27,15,20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-668","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-depth-hypnosis","category-inner-growth","category-personal-empowerment","category-self-care"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/668","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=668"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/668\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":978,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/668\/revisions\/978"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/672"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=668"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=668"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.noevenable.com\/tendthewell\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=668"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}